Usually when I pick up a patient’s chart, it’s pretty clear what the problem is going to be before I even walk in the exam room. But once in a while, I get something vague, like “I need to talk to the doctor.”
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Sometimes this means they are too embarassed to talk to anyone else about what the problem is. Such was the case when I saw a middle aged man who presented with his wife after some trouble with a flashlight.
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I introduced myself to the nervous fellow and asked what the problem was.
“I was fooling around with a flashlight,” he sheepishly reported. “Now I can’t get it out.”
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“You mean you put it in your bottom?” I asked. He nodded.
His wife was looking at him with such contempt, I really felt sorry for him.
I tried to make him feel better about the situation, and let him know that he was certainly not the first person with a rectal foreign body, but it didn’t seem to help. “When did you put it in there?” I asked.
“A week ago.”
At this point, his wife’s jaw dropped open, evidently this was news to her as well.
An xray confirmed the location of the flashlight, which fortunately had a plastic edge just perfect for grabbing with a clamp. A little sedation, and a couple pulls later, and problem solved. We discussed some strategies for avoiding this in the future, and the dangers of puncturing the colon. He assured me that I wouldn’t see him again in the ER. So far, he has been right.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
Gasps.
Mouth drops open.
A week?! I would be really pissed at and disgusted by my husband.
oh, dear…i feel sorry for the guy. i can’t imagine how he must have felt…
“It was just a misunderstanding, honey. I asked for a BUD light.”
I knew something like that was coming. Outstanding.
Large pepper shaker, butter knife, and bowl. Anybody up for a picnic? Not all from the same person but there is a theme.
Thanks for the post! My favorite will always be the Yankee Candle… Back door-Large. Though, the pool balls & water bottle were impressive. Who would have thought?