One unfortunate occupational hazard of being an ER doctor is learning way more than you want to about the sexual practices
of your fellow citizens. This may give us a skewed perspective on what most people enjoy doing in their spare time, but it also keeps the job fascinating. A young man presented to the ER one day with lower abdominal pain and cloudy urine. Urine testing confirmed an infection in the bladder, but he was quite uncomfortable, so an Xray was done as well. This showed very strange, wispy coils of material in the location of the bladder that baffled the radiologist. “Clinical correlation is needed.” said the radiologist, which is what they say when they have no idea what they are looking at, so you better go talk to the patient again.
The ER doctor went right back to the patient and asked him why he might have strange material floating around in his bladder.
“Well, I suppose it could be the snakes I’ve been putting in my penis.” said the patient.
Apparently, there are tiny baby snakes that fit right inside the urethra, and can make it all the way into the bladder. It’s hard to imagine this being a pleasurable sensation, but evidently this patient thought so.
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(Grabs head and screams.)
(Shakes head to eliminate the image that will surely haunt her for the next five years of her life.)
Um. Uh, thanks for sharing?
And I thought I’d heard it all before . . .
Wow. Learn something e v e r y day. i heart you, Doctor!
And I though urethra sounding was a weird new fetish. Why would anyone put a snake in their penis?!! WHY!!
So, what do I take for the nausea this post induced?
Recently we had a female with a crochet hook completely up inside her urethra! Apparently they were in the hot tub fooling around and ooops! Sure enough, there it was on the xray…………kinda makes you squirm in your seat >>>>>>>squirming<<<<<<<<<<
Hey maybe she was trying to hook one of those snakes????……P.S. Surgery was required.
Amanda this site may just be too much for you.
Did you tell him that’s not what “trouser snake” means?
Gack.
Poor snakes. Did the uro have to do a *cough* peetotomy? (That sounds like what you should call chopping up and removing something from a person’s bladder.)
We had a guy once that would put tub caulk up into his wang-doodle!!!! He would inject a large quantity, let it harden and then twirl it around up there! He would get all happy and such…..but once in awhile pieces would break off…and the urologist would have to go afishin’….!!!!!
Steve
Now that is freaky.
Ah! Ah! AAAAHHHHHHH! Gross.
Amazingly enough I’ve heard of this before(worked in large teaching hospital). We wondered which end of the snake they put in first.after visualizing the open mouth(on the snake) on one end.Oh never mind,it’s pretty sad that I have heard this before.*shaking head*
We had a guy once that would put tub caulk up into his wang-doodle!!!! He would inject a large quantity, let it harden and then twirl it around up there! He would get all happy and such…..but once in awhile pieces would break off…and the urologist would have to go afishin’….!!!!!
Now that’s funny right there…I don’t care who ya are!!!
That’s why I keep going to work, I wanna see what happens next!!! Humans sure are funny when their bored!!!
Oh for the love of pete. Gross! Can’t this man just masterbate? Old fashioned but effective.
That was just too funny… It is amazing at what patients neglect to tell us sometimes. Maybe a heads up, like hey doc, I hurt here and here, and have lost track of the my very special snake.
Oh gross!! As a nurse I’m really curious now- who was the poor doc who had to go up there and get them back out? Ewww!